I WROTE "SORRY" ON MY WRIST

12/10/2019

This too shall pass

Now's the time to start hauling

 I'm going to be someone big someday y earning my keep

Instead of begging for blessings
Cause yes I need God to help me see the light

In why oh why I put myself in such a mess

What was the purpose of those triumphs and tests? 

And wasting my breath on those who couldn't love me?
While I still wouldn't go down without a fight
It's a hard pill to swallow

It's a deep cut in my flesh

Hurts like a 1st degree burn

Kills me, may as well have been a piranha bite

I've had hands around my neck, when I was already suffocating

An invisible dagger pierced through my chest

At a time when the past and I were a mess.

I used to question my existence

And was told it wouldn't matter if I died

Then the tables turned

When I learned the blood wasn't on my hands anymore

You know what's something to really cry over? Is when someone is so manipulative, that you can't even tell if their suicide claim is a lie

One time I wrote "sorry" on my wrist but that took less time to heal

The hardest thing I had to do was let a demon go and never know if I would see an obituary

And putting down what I kept on carrying

So now I'd like to think 'isn't she lovely'

It doesn't always feel that way because forced bad habits followed me for awhile

I've been scared that demons will find me on this new path I've turned to

This road I've never known where the sun always shines and it's never too cold

You can even see the gold

I've never felt so warm

Even in a storm

I know I'll be safe now

I've been blessed for some reason, somehow